“So how do you find the London?”
“Oh, it’s pretty easy. Got on a boat in New York, get off in Southampton, got on a train to London, you can’t miss it.”
“Excuse me, I’ve got an impression that you poked my eye with your umbrella, kind sir”
“Oh, I’m terribly sorry”
“Don;t mention it, I still have the other eye left”
I’ve heard old man, you buried your wife last week?
Yes, I had to. You know, dead.
Q: When is a duck?
A: Because one of its legs, are both the same.