our jokes jokes-wiki changes special tell
a new
joke
jokeswiki.org

This wiki was last modified more than half a year ago and will be deleted eventually!

2006-05-03 Joke

eternal life

Jesus was preaching to his disciples and said come forth and you shall win eternal life.

John came fifth and won a toaster.

fuck history

The word ‘fuck’ has been used by many notable people throughout history:

“What the fuck was that?” Mayor of Hiroshima

“Where did all these fucking Indians come from?” General Custer

“Where the fuck is all this water coming from?” Captain of the Titanic

“Thats not a real fucking gun.” John Lennon

“Who’s gonna fucking find out?” Richard Nixon

“Heads are going to fucking roll.” Anne Boleyn

“Let the fucking woman drive.” Commander of Space Shuttle “Challenger”

“What fucking map?” Mark Thatcher

“Any fucking idiot could understand that.” Albert Einstein

“It does so fucking look like her!” Picasso

“How the fuck did you work that out?” Pythagoras

“You want what on the fucking ceiling?” Michaelangelo

“Fuck a duck.” Walt Disney

“Why? Because its fucking there!” Edmund Hilary

“I don’t suppose its gonna fucking rain?” Joan of Arc

“Scattered fucking showers my ass.” Noah

mirror mirror

A young woman buys a mirror at an antique shop, and hangs it on her bathroom door. One evening, while getting undressed, she playfully says “Mirror, mirror, on my door, make my bustline forty four”.

Instantly, there is a brilliant flash of light, and her breasts grow to enormous proportions. Excitedly, she runs to tell her husband what happened, and in minutes they both return.

The husband says “Mirror mirror on the door, make my penis touch the floor!”.

Again, there’s a bright flash…and his legs fall off.